How to Support a Loved One with Depression

Erin Pawlak — Thu, 12 Mar 2026 14:15:00 +0000

According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), an estimated 21 million adults in the United States (about 8.3% of all U.S. adults) had at least one major depressive episode in 2021. For adolescents, about 5 million (20% of U.S. adolescents aged 12 to 17) had at least one major depressive episode in 2021.

Depression can affect anyone, and watching a loved one struggle with it can be challenging, concerning and at times, maybe even scary. While you can’t “fix” their depression, your support can make a significant difference in their journey to recovery.

Educate Yourself About Depression
Self-Knowledge is one of the most crucial things you can do to help your loved one who is struggling with depression. Even having just a basic understanding of depression can make a difference. Mental health still has a lot of stigma attached to it, even in 2026. Depression is a condition, not a weakness or something people can just “snap out of.” If it were that easy, wouldn’t they have done it already?

Active Listening and Empathy
In addition to learning about depression, practice listening to your loved one without judgement. Actively listen to them. That means giving them the time to speak without you trying to fix it or make things better. Let your loved one share their feelings without fear of criticism or dismissal. Sometimes, just having someone listen is a powerful support.

What about well-intended advice? We’ve all been there. Someone trying to help us gives unsolicited advice and we may get upset about it because that isn’t what we currently need. Phrases like “just think positive” or “cheer up” can feel invalidating. Instead, express empathy and understanding and always practice active listening.

Offer Helpful Assistance
Depression often leads to intense feelings of being overwhelmed, and your loved one might not have the energy to do the everyday tasks they normally do when they are not in a depressive state. Preparing meals, running errands or helping with chores can go a long way in assisting your loved ones at this difficult time.

Encouraging Professional Help
If they are not currently seeking professional help, you can gently suggest this but please know that this is up to them. Everyone operates on their own timeline. Some people may not be ready to have professional help, possibly due to stigma and or their own beliefs. Some cultures are not receptive to seeking mental heath help and this is something to also consider.

Supporting a loved one with depression isn’t always easy, but your compassion and understanding can be a lifeline. Small gestures, like checking in regularly or simply listening, can make a meaningful difference in their recovery. Remember, your support can help them feel less alone as they navigate their mental health journey.

If you or your loved one need additional professional support, please feel free to reach out to the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill or call us at The Behavioral Wellness Group. We would
be glad to help.

Erin Pawlak, MS, LPCC-S
Therapist and Adolescent IOP Director
The Behavioral Wellness Group
55A Sheridan Park Circle   Bluffton SC 29910
8224 Mentor Ave #208     Mentor OH 44060
P: 843 278 0008 #307 F: 440 565 2349
P:  440 392 2222 #307    F:  440 565 2349
epawlak@behavioralwellnessgroup.com
www.behavioralwellnessgroup.comup.com

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Parents, Teens and Mental Health

Erin Pawlak — Tue, 09 Sep 2025 14:22:00 +0000

As a mental health professional, I have worked with families, teens and young adults for over a decade. One thing that I repeatedly see is the power struggle parents have with their children. More specifically, about their mental health treatment. It’s common to have a parent call me to either get their child into the Adolescent IOP or into individual therapy to help their child who is maybe self-harming or struggling with suicidal thoughts and impulsivity only to have their child refuse to go. I’ve seen parents back away from treatment at that point and not encourage their child to try therapy. Parents sometimes worry that their kid will “act out” or get “worse” if they are made to go to therapy. Kids have even threatened their parents with their own repercussions if they are forced into therapy.

This is where I ask the parents a simple question. Would you allow your child to decide whether they are going to go to the dentist? The answer has always been no. Why is that? Well, the kid needs to be checked out for cavities and to have a cleaning. Mental health treatment is no different. No. Different. Teenagers are not typically capable of making their own decisions on medical treatment. They must have a parent or guardian make decisions not just for legal reasons but because a teenager is not always able to fully comprehend the long-lasting effect that can happen if they don’t go to the dentist, doctor or even a therapist. Their brain is not fully grown, which impairs them in comprehending the full scope of their actions and making sound choices. Now, some teenagers can realize this, which is great, and they want to get into therapy because they know they need help. I would say this is a small group of kids who feel this way they thought. Most are reluctant to ask for the help or they don’t think they have a problem.

Back to the threats. I have yet to see a kid who came to therapy, against their wishes, act out and or “get worse.” This is a form of manipulation on the kids’ part to get what they want from the parents and sometimes, it unfortunately works. Of course, the parents are worried about their child and want the best for them so that can be a hard decision to make. Will their child follow through with their threat? I suppose it’s possible, I just haven’t experienced it.

If your child is struggling with self-harming behaviors, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts, has been hospitalized for mental health reasons, has been diagnosed with depression and or anxiety, is missing school and isolating from social situations, please consider getting them into either an IOP (Intensive Outpatient Program) or individual therapy. If the above symptoms are present with your child, remember that your child may not be capable of looking at the bigger picture in life and realizing that they need help. This is an executive parental decision. Just like the dentist. It’s no different and it could save your child’s life and get their mental health stabilized.

So, what is an IOP and how can it help teens? Well, The Behavioral Wellness Group offers and Adolescent IOP that I direct and run. IOP meets 3 times a week for 3 hours each time and for 8 weeks. It’s a commitment for both the kid and the parents/families BUT the program works. The kids get to hear from their peers about what they struggle with and what coping skills they’ve learned to use and what works and haven’t worked for them. IOP is focused heavily on DBT (Dialectal Behavioral Therapy) which focuses on reframing negative thinking patterns and destructive behaviors into positive outcomes. DBT helps with regulating emotions, building self-management skills, reducing anxiety symptoms, depression symptoms and stress. DBT is evidence-based and helps to establish coping mechanisms to implement in environments that may elicit old destructive patterns.

To learn more about BWG’s Adolescent IOP, please visit our website at https://www.behavioralwellnessgroup.com/ or feel free to contact me. I’m happy to answer any questions you may have.

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Erin Pawlak, Author at Behavioral Wellness Group

How to Support a Loved One with Depression

Parents, Teens and Mental Health